Re-evaluation

Hi, Fat Girl Slim here. Sorry for the recent absence and lack of posts. I've been in a funk lately. A few things happened, in a very certain order that seemed to lead to my ultimate diet demise. [And yeah, that's super dramatic. There really hasn't been”demise".]

First, I left my precious Vita-mix down in southern Cal at my sister's house. That fucking sucked. I had been so vigilant about drinking green smoothies while I was on vacation, and I truly was feeling on top of my game. Then I get home and have no way to make one. Ugg. Next, we had the bright idea to start the Insanity program. We are nothing if not ambitious, right? However, by day four of insanity the shit hit the fan. Over doing it with the exercise, coupled with my lack of healthy green smoothies equaled one super sick Fat Girl Slim.

Thursday of last week I could tell I was coming down with something. Sore throat, swollen glands, and I also had a bad runny nose. By Friday evening I thought I had a fever. I took my temperature before bed: 102.5 degrees!!! So I had to cancel my seven mile run with MT for the next morning. I didn't really want to, but Mr. FGS is much saner than I, and he said I had to stay home. And basically, I spent the long weekend recovering. No long run, no Insanity, no nothing. I've felt like such a failure.

On top of all this, my husband found out some great news while we were on vacation. He got a job he's been dreaming about for quite some time. It will be total awesomesauce for our future, but in a few weeks he leaves for training. FOUR MONTHS of training. I kind of feel like life is on hold right now. We are prepping for his departure, and we are enjoying our time together. I haven't been as focused as I should be on myself, because I feel like we are in total "prepare" mode. I need to get over this, because how cool would it be to lose some serious weight while he's gone?

This is more of a rambly, stream of consciousness post than I normally do, but I just need to get it all out. I want to do better and get back on track. I'm just lacking that will lately. And we all know you have to have the will.

My new plan has been forming the past few days. I really don't want to overdo it right now. Adding the Insanity work out to the 4 days a week of running has just been too much for my body. It's really made me resent working out, and that's not a good place to be. Also, it made me miss my long run this weekend. That really made me unhappy, because the whole point of this thing is the 1/2 marathon in September! And believe it or not, I really look forward to those runs. It's an amazing sense of accomplishment when you finish one. So in spite of my absolute hatred towards quitters, I'm stopping Insanity. It's a killer workout, and I hope to pick it up again later. Right now though, it's just not in the cards. I really want to add back in Pilates, or something more manageable.

I'm tired. I'm frustrated. I need to find my way back on the horse. Hopefully sooner, rather than later, I'll figure a way to fix all this shit that's floating around in my head and get it back in the game. Hang in there with me, ok?