Starting Over

I've been trying to write this post for a few days now, and the words just won't come out the way I want them to.  But now Tuesday is almost upon me, so I don't have any more chances to post this.  Tomorrow is officially Muffin Top's last day at work with me.  It's the last time we'll spend the day together as we have for almost every week day of the last two years.  It's the last time we'll go to the gym together.  It may even be the last time we listen to Ice Cube together.  I'm so conflicted about this.

First, I have to say that I'm so proud of Muffin Top and her husband.  They set out with a goal of moving to a new city, and damn it, they made it happen.  There was no sitting around day dreaming.  They made plans and stuck to them, and I wish them nothing but the best in their new endeavors.  I know without a doubt both of them will succeed at whatever they do. 

All that said, I kind of feel lost about it all.  Where does this leave me?  Who will kick me out the door and force me to the gym?  Who will sing Ludacris with me?  Who will I have Bob Friday with?  This is all a little scary.

I realized today that I'm pretty much starting over.  And Muffin Top is starting over tenfold.  Scary.  I've been so off track for weeks now.  The lack of routine and the lack of motivation have sent me into a downward spiral.  A lot of our last weeks posts have been depressing at best because nobody relishes in the unknown.  It's hard to be too excited when everything is changing.  Humans crave what is comfortable and safe.  Nothing about this new phase in life seems safe. 

Just the other day I was thinking of all that's happened in the past two years.  I was feeling really emo because as usual, I'm resistent to change.  I don't want Muffin Top to leave; we have a comfortable pattern we've fallen into.  Half the time we can complete each other's sentences.  I guess that's what happens when you spend 40 hours a week in the same room with someone, plus long runs on Saturday.  I'm stubborn and selfish, and I have no desire whatsoever for my routine to change. 

However, I realized that I was in this same predicament a little over 2 years ago.  At that time, I was really was unsure about going back to work.  The thought was scary and sad, and I had no desire to leave my comfort zone.  Hell, I really wasn't even too sure about working with another girl.  I had always been the only one, and I wasn't really up for drama.  Change can be good though.  So many things in my life have improved since I put myself out there again.  If I never would've tried, I would've missed out on SO much. 

In no particular order:

-I've made lots of new friends. 
-Muffin Top and I got gym memberships and ACTUALLY used them a lot!!! 
-We made a running schedule and saw it through, all the way to the half marathon! 
-We actually started this blog, and we've actually posted on it.  Crazy.
-I planted a garden [well, my hubby did!]
-I've officially lost over 25lbs

This list could go on and on.  So much of my life has changed for the better, all because I made that leap and started over.  So, it's time to do it again.

And Muffin Top, I know you are scared, sad and just generally emo, but this is going to be a good change.  These last two years wouldn't of been as crazy good if you weren't around to motivate me, or randomly bitch at me, or just listen to me whine.  I don't think I've ever laughed so hard or spent so much time contemplating random thoughts.  It's been good.  Really good.  But there is more good to come for us all.  I just know it.

"Even though we've changed and we're all finding our own place in the world, we all know that when the tears fall or the smile spreads across our face, we'll come to each other because no matter where this crazy world takes us, nothing will ever change so much to the point where we're not all still friends.”

Busting Out

I didn't post fat stats yesterday. I'm not going to do them today either.

Why? I. just. don't. want. to.

I'm emo, I'm fat, I'm depressed, I'm unmotivated. I'm pissed at myself. Pissed at the world.

Today is the very last Wednesday I will ever work with Fat Girl Slim. And that sucks.

There is just way to much going on in my life right now.

Changing jobs.

Moving kids to a new school.

Moving an entire household with 2 1/2 weeks notice.

Leaving everyone I know and love.

Trying to sell a house that's now worth considerably less than I owe.

And on top of that I've been eating horribly and not counting my calories. This just spirals my depression. Not good. I need to bust out of this ... this ... whatever the hell this is.

Some Weekends Rock

This last weekend happened to be one of them. First, on Friday night, I went out with the work crew and had a BLAST. I was tipsy for the first time in For-EV-er. Then Saturday we headed to the coast where my hubby works. It was an amazing, relaxing, fun-filled time. It was SO nice to spend some time with him on my weekend. And the weather... well I'll let these pictures speak for themselves!!!  Seriously, I'm not sure how I could live in a more gorgeous location. 

Muffin Top is back tomorrow with fat stats. I've had a really hard time getting it together the past few weeks. I'm not sure what's up, but I need to get back on track. ASAP, preferably!!!

I've Got A Feeling...

...That tonight's gonna be a good night.  That tonight's gonna be a good good night.

This week I've exercised ONCE.

I've had ZERO green smoothies.

I've made maybe TWO good decisions with food.

But you know what???  I'm going out tonight.  I'm going out with my work crew [including Muffin Top, natch!], sans kids.  And for just today, I don't give a SHIT about exercise and weight loss. 

Yep. Yep.  NO problems tonight!!!

I'll be back on Monday with something productive to say.  Until then, have a FABULOUS weekend.

CHEERS!!!!

(Belated) Tuesday Fat Stats

Considering today is a fat stats day, we were bad girls.

We started out with really good intentions. It just went downhill from there.

Neither of us could even deal with the thought of going to the gym. Our solution? Spend our hour lunch going for a nice long walk.

And walk we did. We went down to Barnes & Noble and I got my 8 y.o. boy the next Captain Underpants book. Then we walked some more and ended up right smack dab in front of Apple Bee's.

I'm sure it will come as no big surprise that we talked ourselves into going in. Because we are in mourning. It's therapeutic. It cost less than a co-pay. And here's what we had (mine's in the front, FGS is in the back):

Nom, nom, nom

We made one serious mistake though. When we stumbled walked back into the office, our boys were not very impressed that we had not called to invite them. Oops.

They, of course, then felt the need to put this outside the door to our office:

Yes, we work with children

Not nice boys. Not nice.

Anyway, I'm rambling and that's not even the point of this post. It's fat stats time, so here goes:

Fat Girl Slim's Week 53 Numbers:

Muffin Top's Week 53 Numbers:

FGS had a nice week of maintaining - anytime you don't gain it's a win. Don't you ever forget it.

I've been so stressed out that I haven't been able to eat. At all. Hence the 2.8 pounds lost.

I wish I could say it was because I worked my butt off, but that would totally be a lie. I plan to continue this trend though. I will not move and become a fat ass. I will. not. do. it.

Change Is Inevitable

To much is going on to do fat stats today. Tomorrow though - swears!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

There's nothing you can do about it, change is going to happen rather you want it to or not.

Sometimes though, change comes about, and you have no one to blame but yourself.

I've lived in the same area for 17 years now. Mr. MT has lived here 31 years. We've been thinking for some time about relocating to a different area - probably sometime this coming summer. So when we saw a couple of job openings last week, we thought "what the hell".

Well, that "what the hell" has turned into 2 job offers. In a city that is 3 hours away and where I don't know anyone.

We are going to go for it. And I'm scared. Really scared. And sad. And nervous. And emo. And worried. And excited. And now I'm in tears.

Most pertinent to this blog though, I'm going to miss my FGS like a mother fucker. She's my work buddy. She's my gym buddy. She's my gawd damn blogging buddy.

Now I'm crying for real, so I'm just going to leave you with this.

You cannot and will never be replaceable FGS.

We Should've Posted, But...

2nd Annual Fat Stats!!!

One short year ago today, our little blog was born with this post by Fat Girl Slimmed. Can you believe it?!

I honestly wasn't entirely convinced a blog was a good idea. Who would ever read it? It didn't mean I actually had to run a half marathon, did it? I mean, really, what was even the point?

Now listen closely, because this doesn't happen often. But since FGS did it that one time, I'm going to admit it - she was right about the blog. It has been a great place to vent, a place to stay accountable, a place where I get kudos, motivation, and comfort from you guys. Without it I don't know that I would've ever ran that half marathon!

I've got to tell you though, compiling the numbers for this week's fat stats I was more than upset. It's discouraging to see just how far I still have to go. But I'm not going to focus on that - I've ran a HALF MARATHON for Pete's sake!!!

So what have I accomplished? I'll tell you what, I've lost FOURTEEN inches. That's no small thang baby! I've also managed to lose 2.8 pounds (it was considerably more before the debacle that was the holidays). I'm going to put a positive spin on that and mention for that many inches lost, I've obviously replaced a bunch of fat with muscle!

Do I want more? Hell yes. Am I going to get there? Hell yes.

Muffin Top's Week 52 Numbers:

And our little FGS? How about her?

Home girl has lost a whopping THIRTY FOUR inches! Not only that, she's managed to lose (and keep off) 25.9 pounds. Can I get a hell yeah?!

Fat Girl Slim's Week 52 Numbers:

Stay tuned for my get-skinny-by-my-birthday plan tomorrow!

Commitment Phobia

You wouldn't think just by looking at me that I have commitment issues.  I happily married my husband after knowing him less than a year.  I own a house [that I'm, unfortunately, very committed to], and I've been at the same job for years.  The truth is though, I'm petrified of committing to things.  Especially if these "things" have a potential for me to fail.  Maybe the fear I have is actually of failure??  Who knows.  Certainly not me!  Maybe my shrink??

Anyways, when we decided to run a half marathon, I really didn't think it through.  I just went for it with reckless abandon.  Head first, balls deep.  It was exhilirating.  It was terrifying.  And in the end, it was exhausting.

Bwahahahaha...   Too funny not to share.

So, I've been hemming and hawing [wtf does that mean exactly anyways?] over whether or not to run a marathon.  And at the moment, I'm not commiting to it.  What I am commiting to, however, is the next three weeks.  I've found a 24-week marathon training plan I'm interested in [and a marathon, shhhhh!!], so here goes nothing.  Below, for your viewing pleasure, my next three weeks in exercise land.  I had to modify it to fit my crazy schedule, but I think it will work.

Week 1: January 10-16: Total Miles: 9

Monday - Run 2 miles, weight circuit
Tuesday- Run 2 miles
Wednesday- LONG Run 3 miles
Thursday - Rest
Friday - Run 2 miles, weight circuit
Saturday-Cross train
Sunday - Rest

Week 2: January 17-23: Total Miles: 11

Monday - Run 2 miles, weight circuit
Tuesday- Run 3 miles
Wednesday- LONG Run 4 miles
Thursday - Rest
Friday - Run 2 miles, weight circuit
Saturday-Cross train
Sunday - Rest

Week 3: January 24-30: Total Miles: 14

Monday - Run 3 miles, weight circuit
Tuesday- Run 3 miles
Wednesday- LONG Run 5 miles
Thursday - Rest
Friday - Run 3 miles, weight circuit
Saturday-Cross train
Sunday - Rest

This little schedule will get me through January, and maybe by that point I'll commit to my marathon.  Maybe.

Getting My Game Face On

There are 9 weeks until my 33rd birthday.

33 isn't really any big milestone. But I want it to be. I want it to be the year that I achieve some goals. Things that I've been dragging out for years and years - I want to be done with them. I want the satisfaction of crossing the proverbial finish line (and maybe a few actual ones).

To be right up-front with you, I'm not in a really good place right now. I blew it over the holidays. I feel completely fat, bloated, disgusting, and undesirable. I cannot explain to the amount of anger that I'm feeling towards myself.

Anger for dropping the ball.

Anger for not caring enough about myself.

Anger for having that last 15 pieces of chocolate.

Anger for saying "screw it", when I should've said "I got this".

The list could really go on, and on, and on...

But I'm tired of being a whiner. Tired of focusing on the negative. Tired of beating myself up.

So, now what?

It's time to get my game face on.

Cause you know what talking about accomplishes?

Not a damn thing.

If you want results, you've got to get off your ass and do something about it.

You know who made me fat?

Me.

You know who's going to make me a skinny bitch.

ME. That's who.

Bringin' Back The Big Green Hump

It's been awhile since I've added to your green smoothie repertoire, so I figured it was due. For the past three weeks I've been fighting off a nasty cough/cold combo. The cold symptoms are mostly gone, but this cough just won't go away. I've started an all-out war to get rid of it!! Green smoothies, vitamins, exercise (although not too much) and sleep are all on the agenda.

Yeah, been neglecting myself for awhile again now...

Since we're kind of in "new year, new you" mode around these parts, I figured I'd throw out a really good detox smoothie recipe featuring citrus. Lemons, limes, oranges, etc. rank highly amongst fruit for their detoxing abilities.

So without further ado, blend one of these up and drink to a new year!

"The Limon Detox"

1 lemon, peeled and deseeded
1 lime, peeled and deseeded
3 bananas, peeled
1 cup orange juice
2 cups kale

Blend, drink, repeat.

The First Fat Stats of 2011

I hope that you all aren't expecting epicness.

It is, after all, the first fat stats after that (should be) four lettered word - holidays. Can you hear the disgust in my tone?

Fuck the holidays, with it's pies, rolls, fudge, cookies, mashed potatoes, and the frequent family-induced drinking.

Because, you know what the end result is?

I'll tell you what. It's a fat ass.

Please, God, let my ass never be in this predicament.

Poor thing probably didn't even realize :(

But never fear - I am capable of ALL KINDS of fake perkiness :) Woo-fucking-hoo!

Seriously though, it's on. Like I've always said "nut up, or shut up". And, well, it's NUT UP TIME!!!

I'm turning 33 in two months and I have every intention of being considerably thinner than I am at this moment. This is a journey, and I'm in it for the long haul.

With that said, time to fess up the damage done over the last few weeks.

Fat Girl Slim's Weekly Numbers:

Muffin Top's Weekly Numbers:

Yes, there was some serious damage done.

No, it will not stay like that.

Stay tuned for our plan of action!!!

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year to all our wonderful readers!

Here's looking forward to a year full of results, success, and a crap-ton of fun too :)

Stay tuned for Monday's post on our resolutions!