Why do I do it to myself? Why do I pretend it's okay to put myself down? To call myself cruel and hurtful things? Why do I find it acceptable to verbally abuse myself?
Honestly, I have no idea why. I'm sure some psychologist could find some deep seated issues from my childhood...
But that's not really the point. The point is:
It is NOT okay.
At all.
Ever.
If someone else says something offensive to me, I am quick to defend myself. I am not the type of person to take bull shit lying down.
I have to do this for myself too! I deserve it.
Which brings me to another point. It's almost horrifying how little I believe in myself. Just typing those words "I deserve it" was actually hard for me. I don't think I actually believe those words. I don't know when it happened, but I've stopped even believing that I have the right to healthy and happy.
And you know what? That is utter bull shit.
I don't know how many of you out there are the same way - but we have got to stop this! If I don't believe I deserve to lose weight, how in the hell is it ever going to become a reality?
I need to become my own personal cheerleader. Because as fucking wonderful as you all are, if I don't root for myself it doesn't matter what anyone else says.
So, I say - GO M.T.!!!
RAH! RAH! RAH!
Beautifully put..you have to be your own cheerleader, believe in yourself and you can do anything you set your mind to do!
ReplyDeleteShawn
Great post. I think we all do this, and things really start to move faster when we stop. It's funny how it works, though, isn't it? How we would never think or say these things about other people... how we never would judge people as we judge ourselves. pretty bizarre.
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