Thursday, October 14, 2010

Let's Talk About Boobies

Because really, who doesn't love boobies?? I've always been a pretty busty girl. Around 14 years old the boobs grew in at full force. And I got a boyfriend. Coincidence or conspiracy??? Anyways, pretty much since puberty I've ran between a D and DDD in cup size, depending on whether or not I was skinny or nursing babies or pregnant. Pregnancy can do a number on boobs, can't it? One day the titty fairy arrives, and BAM, you have Grade A, Porn-approved knockers that you [and your husband/wife/baby daddy/boyfriend/girlfriend/random strangers] just can't get over.

Nobody can resist...

Of all the things I've done to my boobies though [pregnancy, nursing for years, etc.], nothing, and I truly mean NOTHING has made them shrink. Until now, that is. The other day I looked into the mirror and said [out loud], "Where the FUCK did my boobs go?!?!?!?", because seriously, the fun bags are starting to totally go MIA. I realized my bra is starting to look like it's holding two little eggs in two big baskets.

So what's a woman to do??? I dug deep into my drawers to find my smaller bras. The D selection. I threw one of those on, ran to the mirror and.... still too fucking big. Could I really be moving into C territory?? I haven't been in C territory since 6th grade!!! And I certainly weighed less than 174lbs then. I was about 130.

Has anyone else experienced massive knocker shrinkage? I'm not sure how I feel about this yet, but I know it isn't good. My girls are two of my very favorite assets, and it's going to hurt a little to say good bye to them in the name of skinny. Then again, I could always go all Muffin Top and get fake ones. She keeps losing weight, but the boobies remain.... Bitch.


  1. See, this is one the of the things I am looking forward to. I can't wait until I am small enough to buy bras at a normal store. Target bras = my weight loss goals. At my current 34F, I have a ways to go. And man, was I pissed when I lost my first 20 pounds and my bra size didn't change.

  2. I paid a lot of money to make sure mine never shrink ;)