Monday Fat Stats: Week 11

I started this week (yesterday) with a horrible head cold, a barely able to get off the couch, wishing I was unconscious, type of cold. I'm sure that the exhaustion from running thirty nine straight minutes the day before added somewhat to my misery. FGS met up at 6:50 in the morning on a Saturday to go running! Holla!!!

I'm not getting to the point though, which is that I've taken a crap load of cold medicine, so if this post is wandering and slightly incoherent - forgive me.

Another week has gone by, and frankly I am pretty shocked that I have stuck with this. There is a reason that this blogs title contains the word's "half ass". I've never been known for my stick-to-it-ness, and really I have somewhere over the years lost my belief in myself. Knowing this is week 11 and I'm still at it brings me real hope. I try not to focus on the fact that my numbers aren't as big as I want them to be. Fact is, though the progression is slow, my numbers continue to GO DOWN (that's what he said!).

Fat Girl Slim's Week 11 Numbers:

Muffin Top's Week 11 Numbers:

You might be wondering how we did on our workout schedule last week - we did some minor tweaking, but regardless, we ROCKED IT! I am so, so, so proud of both us. We've continually upped the amount of time we are running (Mon = 23 min, Wed = 25 min, Thurs = 27.5 min, Sat = 39 min), and are no longer taking walking breaks during the run.

Here's our game plan for this week:

I should probably attempt to add something witty/funny/charming here, but my throat is scratchy, my head is pounding, and I'm just to tired. At least I got in my run and the shred :)

Here's to a GREAT week!!!

Oh The Things You'll Learn

There are many things you'll learn when trying to be healthy and get and shape, here are some of the things that I've only just recently realized:

The true meaning of being sore: you are truly sore when all you want in the morning is a nice hot cup of coffee, but you cannot hold the coffee pot up long enough to pour it :(

The Shred: a dvd workout hosted by Jillian Michaels. Basically THE workout that all others are measured by. Once you start the shred all other workouts seem tame in comparison. I tried one of the biggest loser workout dvds and I wasn't even sweating at minute FOURTEEN. Come one people! If I can still breathe and my muscles aren't trembling with fatigue, it is not a real workout!
   * Side Note: If anyone knows of some ass-kicking workouts on par with the shred, PLEASE TELL ME what they are!!!

People will think you are stupid: To be committed to getting in shape and ready to run a race you will have to do things that you would normally laugh at. If today is a scheduled run day, and it's raining, tough shit - suck it up. This is not to say that I don't whine and complain the entire time before and during the run. But I'm complaining WHILE I do it. And it's not that I blame the people who've been calling me crazy - a few months ago I would have done the same thing. So I just smile back, put my running shoes on, and head out the door.

They're just jealous they don't have you're stamina (that's what she said!)

You can have fun in a spin class: while no bike is actually involved, the workout itself might be even better. The only supplies needed are one husband (if you're not married, just find a guy). Now, with said husband, make him lay down and practice your squatting (aka 'riding') for a good 20 minutes. If done right you won't be able to move your legs without wincing (and it was fun!).

"Getting in shape" never really happens: Some people will argue with me on this, and that's fine since I know that I'm always right. "In shape" isn't like a destination, a place you go, and once you're that's it. There's no "all done", no "damn I'm glad that's over". Why? Because it never is. Even if you achieve results beyond your wildest imagination, even if you have abs as hard as titanium, even if you're thighs don't touch when you walk - if you stop "getting in shape" - it WILL ALL GO AWAY. This completely sucks ass. I know this. But better to deal with the reality of it then go back to the way I was!

It happens to the best of us...

The Big Green Hump: A Beginner's Lesson

We've been making green smoothies and posting the recipes nearly the entire time we've had this little blog. Muffin Top and I are HUGE advocates of the yummy, green smoothies we've been making, and we truly cannot say enough about them. Over the past couple of weeks, we've received lots of questions about how you make the smoothies and what you put in them, so I figured it was time for a refresher of sorts. I wanted to get back to basics and give people a post they can refer to if they have green smoothie questions.

So, let's assume you are new to this party. You may be wondering what's wrong with your old smoothie. You throw a little fruit and yogurt in the blender, and voila. Healthy. If there aren't any greens in your smoothie, however, it's just not cutting it. Greens are where it's at. Adding some green goods to your normally fruity faire will add to the health benefits like nobody's business. Fiber, chlorophyll, and dense nutrition come packed in every leafy green. Trust me. You have to try these. At least give them a fighting chance!

So let's talk foundation ingredients in a green smoothie. First you need a liquid. Right around 2 cups, maybe more if you are blending a big batch or are incorporating a lot of frozen ingredients.

-Almond milk, coconut milk or soy milk
-Pure water
-Tea (any kind, knock yourself out!) I prefer green or black.
-Fresh Juices (again, knock yourself out, but make sure it's not processed)

Next comes the rock stars of this smoothie, the greens. Feel free to mix and match these as you see fit. You can add just a handful or a few cups if you are feeling frisky.

-Collards
-Baby Spinach (great for beginners!)
-Kale
-Romaine
-Bok Choy
-Celery
-Cabbage
-Cucumbers (make sure you peel them if they aren't organic!)
-Broccoli stems

Finally, add some fruit to make it taste yummy. I try to stick with in season or frozen fruits, so I only have to add minimal sweetener [agave nectar] to make the things edible. Today for the first time this year, I actually put fresh, organic strawberries in my smoothie. Oh my hell! It was delish. I must do this every day from here on out. Anyways, add some fruit to your smoothie and say hello to all the marvelous antioxidants.

-Banana (a smoothie staple)
-Strawberries
-Blueberries
-Pineapple (a must for me)
-Mango
-Cherries
-Melons (all varieties)

Always taste your blend after you've finished to see if it could use a little somethin' somethin' to give it a sweeter flavor. It might need more or less sweetener, depending on how ripe your fruit is. [Did that sound dirty to anyone else? Maybe it's just me...]

-Agave nectar (my fav)
-Honey
-Dates (remove the pits!)
-Figs
-Coconut flakes
-Stevia (use sparingly)

Mix and match all this yummy goodness and be completely amazed at how you feel. I really can't describe how much energy these give me. Here's the smoothie I had for breakfast and the point value (by request!). It was SO freaking good.

2 cups black tea (0 points)
2 cups baby spinach (0 points)
2 carrots (0 points)
1 cup strawberries (1 point)
1 cup pineapple (1 point)
1 cup blueberries (1 point)
1 tbsp agave nectar (1 point)

Total 32 oz smoothie = 4 ww points [not bad!]

If you have any questions regarding green smoothies, don't hesitate to email Muffin Top or myself. We'd be more than happy to answer them for you!

Sticking It To The Plan.

Last week was a pretty good week for me. Unlike MT, I was thrilled to maintain my weight, because I figured gaining would be inevitable. After puking up 5.2 lbs, I assumed at least one or two of them would come back as water weight or something. So the fact that they didn't is really cool. This week, however, I want the scale to move again. Preferably down. I have a really hard time staying stagnant for more than a week; it makes me feel angry.


The best thing I've found I can do to get that scale moving down is to plan. Plan my food intake, plan my exercise, and make sure I follow through. It's really helpful to know what I'm doing in advance, especially with the busy schedule I've got going on lately.

Take today, for example. I've already mapped everything out, and I know when I get home I have to do Shred: Level 2 and Pilates. I also know that all I have left to eat today is a bowl of oatmeal and a green smoothie. This is some tough knowledge, because a king size Snickers bar is calling to me from the kitchen. No, not just calling to me, it's screaming at me. However, if I waste calories on that, I won't have enough for my smoothie, and I NEED that smoothie. It keeps me healthy. It gives me increased energy. So you know what? I'm telling that Snickers bar to fuck off. I've got a race to run, and poor planning on my part can really sabotage my efforts.

Go away you peanuty bar of happiness!!!

I figured I'd show you my daily menu, so you could have an idea of what I'm eating. While I have been far from perfect in past weeks, I'm really trying to stick with my eating schedule now. I need more results in less time.

Food Intake: March 23, 2010

Breakfast:

2 cups fresh pineapple (2 points)
1 small bag microwave popcorn (1 point)

Lunch:

Linguine alla Marinara (6 points) [Hell yes for Olive Garden!]
2 Breadsticks (4 points)
Glass of Orange Juice (3 points)

Dinner:

Steel cut oats and Soy Milk (3 points)
Green smoothie (5 points)

This brings my daily total to 24 Weight Watchers points. Eight total servings of fruit and veggies for the day is pretty damn good as well. With as much exercise as we've been busting out, it's crucial for us to get all the nutrients we need. It's hard enough to run without adding nutrition deprivation to it.

Plan, plan and then plan some more. Let's all hope I can follow this advice for the rest of the week.

Monday FAT Stats: Week 10

Maybe we should have called these "Monday THIN Stats", because I'm really feeling the fat in "Fat Stats" today. It's Monday, no more soda or alcohol for 3 weeks, I'm at work and it's gorgeous outside, FGS is blaming me for her bad attitude (she even called me, and I quote, "whiny bitch"), did I mention NO ALCOHOL?

Keep telling yourself that.

I'll bet there's a kick-ass story behind this picture though!!!

So, it's come clean time. Neither one of us lost anything. Not a fraction of a pound, not a quarter of an inch. Even though nothing changed this week, I'm putting our numbers up for those of you who may not have seen our progress to date. Since this is week TEN, I'm going to put our height and goal too.

Fat Girl Slim's Refresher:

  *  Height: 5' 2"

  *  Goal weight loss: 50 lbs

  *  Lbs lost to date: 11.6

  *  Percent of goal lost to date: 23.2%

  *  Inches lost to date: 15.5

Fat Girl Slim: Week 10 Numbers

Muffin Top's Refresher:
  *  Height: 5' 10"
  *  Goal weight loss: 30 lbs
  *  Lbs lost to date: 4.6
  *  Percent of goal lost to date: 15.3%
  *  Inches lost to date: 7.5

Muffin Top: Week 10 Numbers:

Really anything that isn't a gain is a step in the right direction. I know this, but it is really hard to reconcile that fact with the sinking feeling in my stomach when I step on the scale and it doesn't budge. The feeling that busting my ass is for, what exactly? Not a damn thing apparently.

Like FGS said though, we haven't been completely consistent. We make grand plans every week, but don't ever follow them to the letter. In the final weeks before the 5K we are going to be ON IT! Not only are we going to do EXACTLY what the work-out schedule calls for, but we are going to stay on our point/calorie goal every day.

Rather than a vague "do cross-training x days per week" or "run x days" we cemented out a schedule that must be followed - or beatings will occur! Here's what we are up against:

I think I can, I think I can (can't I?) 

Getting My Shit Together

Our 5K is in 3 weeks from tomorrow. 21 days, that's it. Really, that's plenty of time - last year when we attempted the same run we started our 'training' (and I use the term very loosely) 4 weeks before the actual event. We couldn't even run 3 minutes let alone 3 miles! This year we are already running TWENTY MINUTES at a time! * yeah us *

I can't be content with that though - I'm a worrier, it's what I do. Have I ran enough? Have I done enough cross-training? Would Jillian approve? Have I eaten good enough? Well, that one's a definite no...

If we don't have a plan there is no way we will finish that 5K in our goal time of 30 minutes (or less!). It's time to put on our game faces, buck up, bite the bullet, cowboy up, put on our big girl panties...

You get the point.

So our plan is basically broken down into 3 or 4 (or 5) categories:
 
1. Run. Duh, what else would our first priority be? We are going to run a minimum of 3 times per week, we'll throw in a fourth run if we are feeling extra frisky. Not this weekend, but on the following 2 weekends we are going to run the exact route that the 5K will follow. Nothing like a little practice to get you focused!
 
2. Stop slacking on the cross-training! I was doing the Shred almost every day and pilates on some mornings, I was doing really good! Now, not so much. So the goal for next week is to do the shred (levels 1 & 2 alternating) 6 days a week. The following week we're going to bust out the before-now-unthinkable LEVEL THREE shred. Yeah, we're crazy like that! The week right before the run will have to be a little more mellow though, I don't know - we'll figure that one out later.
 
3. Green smoothies. We can't afford to get sick. Green smoothies are full of all kinds of healthy crap that I don't ever actually eat except in smoothie form. For the next 3 weeks they will be a daily requirement!!! If you aren't sure about the whole smoothie thing, we've posted tons of great recipes - just look under "The Big Green Hump".
 
4. Protien. This is a hard one for me. I'm not a real meat eater, I grew up in Eugene where dinners consisted of tofu, brown rice, and steamed brocolli (or steamed carrots and/or cauliflower if my step-monster wanted to mix things up a little). Add that to 2 years of working at Burger King in high school and you have one very un-meat loving girl. But protien builds muscle and helps your muscles heal. So I need to find other ways to get it.
 

Seriously, you look at this shit and think "Yummy! I want a piece of that!"

[Editorial note from FGS - "Just cause I eat meat DOESN'T mean I want to eat a MEAT BABY!"]

 

5. This one is super hard for me to - sleep. We need to get at least 7 1/2 - 8 hours every single night. All that crap I need to do will still be there in the morning (unfortunately).

 

6. This is the final one, and the one I most desperately DO NOT want to do! No alcohol :( At least, after this week, no more alcohol until after the run. But after that? It's On Like Donkey Kong!!!

 

My (one of many) true loves!

I'm Back... From Outerspace... Or My Bathroom Floor. You Pick.

So, what started out as a kick ass weekend ended tragically last Friday. Muffin Top, my BFF and I all went to see Remember Me directly after work. Two fabulous hours were spent swooning over Robert Pattinson [Hey, don't judge! There are worse vices!], and by the time we left, I figured the entire weekend was going to rock. Wrong.

Yeah, when you think things are going to be great... they might not be.

Five minutes into my drive home and Mr. FGS calls. Our daughter had just thrown up her dinner everywhere. I knew right then it was going to be bad. Inevitably, if one of our kids gets the stomach flu, so do I. I must've been born pre-dispositioned to puking. If anyone even has a hint of nausea around me, I'm destined to get it. It sucks a lot.

Hey look!  It's me last weekend!

Sure enough, I woke up at midnight bolting for the bathroom, where I remained for the rest of the weekend. You know, that weekend that had started off so well. The one that was going to kick ass! Sure, "Puke Fest 2010" really helped put up impressive numbers on the scale this week, but it did nothing to help me with running. Our 5k race is looming, and I've actually felt almost too weak to walk up the stairs. Today though, I figured it was on. Have to, need to, don't want to, but I'm going to run. This is what I kept telling myself.

I'm not going to lie to you people, that run was a total bitch. At about five minutes in I thought I might die. By ten minutes, I was sure of it. I am sitting here wondering how we even made it back, because during the run I was fairly positive we never would. At one point, Muffin Top asked me if I'd drag her body away from traffic if she fainted. I don't even think I had the energy to laugh. It was that hard! [That's what she said.] Somehow though, we finished. Hell, we even took 40 seconds off of our fastest time!!!  Impressive.

If we had any energy left, this would've been us after we realized we ran faster than usual.  Except without the helmets....

I'm glad we got out there and ran. I find more and more lately that I'm amazed at what I'm capable of. The Fat Girl Slim I've always known and loved would never run two days post epic stomach flu. She'd never run in the hail. It's an odd feeling to not know yourself anymore. I kinda like it.

On a totally unrelated note, I need to wish my baby girl a Happy 2nd Birthday, and my husband a Happy 4th Anniversary. They are my motivation when I have none, and the reason I fight the good battle. I could do none of this without them!